Definitions: Helpmate – Handmaiden – Harlot
Helpmate: A married woman who is committed to the well being of her husband.
Handmaiden: An unmarried or married woman who is committed to serving the Lord.
Harlot: An unmarried or married woman who will sacrifice her soul or body for personal gain.

Scripture Focus:
Helpmate: Proverbs 12:25 – An anxious heart weighs a man down, but a kind word cheers him up. Philippians 4:6 – Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God; and the peace of God, which passes all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds through Jesus Christ.

Handmaiden: Psalm 94:18 – When I said, “My foot is slipping,” your love, O LORD, supported me. When anxiety was great within me, your comfort brought joy to my soul. Luke 12:29-31 (NLB) –And do not worry about food—what to eat and drink. These things dominate the thoughts of most people, but your Father already knows your needs. Don’t worry whether God will provide for you…He will give you all you need each day if you make the Kingdom of God your primary concern.

Harlot: Isaiah 57:20-21 (NLT) – “But those who still reject me are like a restless sea. It is never still but continually churns up mire and dirt. There is no peace for the wicked,” says my God. Proverbs 28:1 – The wicked run away when no one is chasing them, but the godly are as bold as lions.

Anxiety: Definition: To be worried, fearful or distressed about the uncertainties of life. Stress: Definition: Mental, emotional and/or physical tension, distress or strain.

OPENING STATEMENT:

The Helpmate's Story: Poor diet and the lack of exercise are not the only threats to a healthy lifestyle. A marriage that is filled with stress and anxiety (characterized by worry, frustration, fear and anger), can cause the malfunction of your vital organs and make you and your husband vulnerable to disease, allergies and accidents. Your task as a godly helpmate is to treat anxiety as the enemy of your marriage. The first line of defense is to be anxious for nothing…Philippians 4:6. Work to make your prayer life bigger than your problems. If possible, pray with your husband on a daily basis. Rehearse God’s faithfulness in your life and the promises of His Word. Secondly, recognize that your words have the power to create anxiety, or to destroy it. Proverbs 12:25 says, An anxious heart weighs a man down, but a kind word cheers him up. If your husband is worried and upset, don’t add to the problem by being critical or talking gloom and doom. Proverbs 12:18 says that reckless words pierce like a sword, but the tongue of the wise brings healing. Finally, take a break together. Go to the movies. Cook outside on the grill. Take a long walk. As you relax, talk, pray and laugh together, agree not to give up! It will be medicine to your soul.

The Handmaiden's Story: When it comes to serving the Lord and living a peaceful life, it’s easy for an unmarried woman to think that if she had a husband to comfort her, she would be less anxious. Many married women feel just the opposite. They believe that if they could get away from their husband (even for a day or two) all of their stress and anxieties would disappear. The truth is that whatever your marital status, you will be faced with challenges that can lead to high levels of stress and anxiety. If you are hoping to find peace of mind, comfort and moral support in a person, you’ll find yourself wondering: “What if they don’t come through? What if they get tired of hearing about my troubles?” As your mind races, so will your blood pressure, heart-rate and hormonal system. The only one who can truly take away your anxiety is the Lord. Psalm 94:18b, says, When anxiety was great within me, your comfort brought joy to my soul. So here’s the drill. Take a prayer-walk in the morning, lunch-time or after dinner. Talk to the Lord and let Him talk back to you. Then, get a life! Stop worrying and waiting for your ship to come in; your prince; your kids; or your big break. Anxiety is created by the fear of what the future holds, so live one day at a time. Luke 12:29&31 (paraphrased) says, Don’t worry whether God will provide for you…He will give you all you need each day if you make the Kingdom of God your primary concern.

The Harlot's Story: The lure of the fast life is the belief that you can get what you want if you bend, alter or break a few of God’s rules. The harlot soon finds out that in spite of all the bling and good times, disobedience to the Word of God can lead to stress and anxiety. Isaiah 57:20 says, “But those who still reject me are like the restless sea. It is never still but continually churns up mire and dirt…There is no peace for the wicked,” says my God. The life of the harlot demands that she lives a lie. She makes herself believe that money, men and good times will make her happy. But deep inside, she is filled with anxiety because guilt, shame and an uncertain future are draining her inner peace. Her anxious state of mind requires drugs (prescription and otherwise), alcohol, binge eating and other destructive behavior just to get through the day. You may be doing something that’s illegal; going from one relationship to the next; or doing other things that leave you feeling depressed, worried, and frustrated. But the Lord still loves you and wants to give you rest. Jeremiah 3:1 You have played the harlot with many lovers, says the LORD. Yet I am still calling you to come back to me. The Lord wants to take away your anxiety and restore your health. Isaiah 44:22 says, “I have swept away your offenses like a cloud, your sins like the morning mist. Return to me, for I have redeemed you.”

Your Story: What medical problems have you encountered that were the result of stress and anxiety? What did you do to find peace and get your health back on track?

OBSERVATIONS AND PERSONALIZATION:

Helpmates: Sometimes it’s the little things that you and your husband do to each other that can leave you both with feelings of anxiety.
1. What small thing can you ask of your husband that would keep you from “freaking out?” Find a way to talk to him about your needs.
2. Ask you husband what small thing you can do to make his life more peaceful. If possible, try your best to comply.
3. Find a calming scripture to write down and place it in his shirt or jacket pocket before he goes to work. Take another moment to find calming scripture for yourself.

Handmaidens: As long as you stay close to the Lord the things that you are anxious about will end up in one of two categories.
1. You will one day laugh about your experience.
2. You will one day share your testimony of how the Lord brought you through a difficult experience. Now is the time to remember how anxious you once where about a situation in your life. So get busy and write down one serious victory and one laughable experience in your life.

Harlots: None of us have been perfect all of our lives. What advice would you give to a sister-friend who is involved in an ungodly lifestyle that will lead to stress and anxiety?
1. Involved with an ungodly man/woman or multiple relationships.
2. Choosing to compromise her relationship with Christ for the sake of making money.
3. Hanging out with ungodly people who are involved in illegal or high-risk practices.

GOT STRESS???

PLEASE EMAIL US YOUR “STRESS BREAKER” TIPS

www.wdgonline.org

1. Take a long, warm bath with candles and scented oils.

2. Take up a simple and inexpensive hobby.

3. Try walking, swimming, golf or other outdoor activities.

NOW IT’S YOUR TURN TO ADD TO THE LIST!

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Stories From HHH Healthy Life Lessons
Note: Stories and comments may be presented in an edited version.

Lesson #1 Cleansing the Body-Temple
Tegra Pasadena, CA
God has the power to heal!

The biggest challenge in my life has been my struggle with trying to have children.
I had a miscarriage in Oct. of 1999, which led to a Cancer scare. In December 2002, I suffered another miscarriage which also resulted in another D&C surgical procedure. In December 2003, I was hit with another pregnancy loss which led to yet another D&C surgical procedure in January, 2004. My last and final pregnancy loss was diagnosed as Cancer. On June 24, 2004, my doctor, who I admire and respect, called me with the terrible news. He explained to me that I had a serious problem. I MUST get an aggressive form of chemotherapy RIGHT AWAY. In order to treat the problem, I would also probably need a full hysterectomy. If I didn’t do one or the other: “YOU WILL DIE FROM THIS!” These five words didn’t scare or intimidate me because I already knew the devil was a liar and he was already defeated. You see, what my doctor didn’t clearly understand was that I had a committed intimate prayer life for 2 ½ years prior to him giving me my diagnosis in Jan. of 2004. My daily dress rehearsal of prayers had already prepared me for what I was facing. My prayers in would become a matter of survival for me. I began studying various scriptures about divine healing. God will never put more on us than what we can handle. He knew that I could handle it and I also knew that I was well prepared to handle the battle. "When you pass through the water, I will be with you; And through the rivers, they shall not overflow you. When you walk through the fire, you shall not be burned, Nor shall the flame scorch you.” Isaiah 43:2 I knew that my victory was in my praise and that my sickness was not unto death. I continued crying out to God for Him to get ALL of the glory in my situation. In return, the Lord equipped me with all that I needed to stand up against a demonic force that wanted nothing more than to take my life and to destroy the dreams that I had with my husband to bring forth children into this world.
This story will be continued in our next lesson. Find out how the Lord restored the health of a sister who trusted in His Word.

Lisa Lamarre Mattapan, Mass.
Lesson#2: Controlling Your Appetite
Congratulations to Vanessa!
Dear Vanessa:
I read your story last week and I want to congratulate you on losing the weight. It takes a lot of work and you did it. I am trying to maintain my weight and it’s a constant struggle. With God’s help we will make it.
Your sister in Christ, Lisa Lamarre, jovhany@juno.com

Anonymous
Lesson #2 My husband can’t stand to be near me. I’m at the breaking point.
I knew my husband was not saved when I met him, but I sought after him with a vengeance. At the same time I was seeking the things of God. Even though all of the red flags were there, I chose to ignore them and marry the man I loved. Now the consequences of my decision to become unequally yoked haunt me daily. I am so stressed out and depressed that I cry myself to sleep at night, while during the day I walk around acting as though things are well with me. How can I describe to you how deep the pain goes? Most of the time I want to end my life because I cannot stand the agony of feeling alone and unloved. My spirit feels like its dying…my prayers never cease. How can I pray for my husband? He can’t stand to be in the same house with me. I get the feeling that he doesn’t like me. When I come into the room he leaves. He refuses to sleep in the same bed with me and I don’t see him at all on the weekends. If I say anything to him he curses and yells at me. He’s very intimidating and I am in fear of him. What should I do?

Answer:
Wow! I’m almost lost for words. I feel your pain and I know that many women have been where you are. The thing that stands out to me is that it appears that your husband has lost respect for you. I know you desperately want to be loved by him, but begging for his attention will only make him resent you more. Read Psalm 139: 13-18. It’s time to re-discover your value as a woman and as a child of God. You are not a doormat to be walked on. You are fearfully and wonderfully made - Psalm 139:14. Stop chasing after someone who does not value you and run to the arms of the one who does…the Lord Jesus Christ. As you rebuild your relationship with the Lord, I promise that He will heal your heart and deal with your husband and marriage in a way that you never could.
Blessings, Terri Mc-Sol

Women's Discipleship Group
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